


Field of Vision

by DangersUntoldHardshipsUnnumbered



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:34:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27074293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangersUntoldHardshipsUnnumbered/pseuds/DangersUntoldHardshipsUnnumbered
Summary: A role reversal ficlet in which Alex & Astra's iconic rooftop moment consists of Astra pleading with Alex to switch sides.
Relationships: Astra/Alex Danvers
Comments: 15
Kudos: 34
Collections: General Danvers & Supercat Week 5





	Field of Vision

Alex can see no stars. 

The sky is blanketed with thick clouds, spitting drops that darken the tarpaper rooftop. She’s pretty sure she’s dying. 

Of course, she’s had that feeling a number of times, now. She was right, too, but they managed to reel her back from the edge of death. This time feels different. 

Astra’s hand is around her throat, the weight of her body pressing her back against a stone ledge. 

“Join us,” Astra is whispering fiercely. “You know that humanity is too stupid to fix this problem. You know that if left to their own devices, they will turn this planet into a slag heap.”

There’s a burning in her throat. Hot tears squeeze out the corners of her eyes. She knows Astra is right, of course, but she also knows that she has no choice but to fight this fight. “You don’t know what I know,” she gasps, as Astra loosens her grip ever so slightly for a moment. She takes a pull of air. “You don’t know me.” 

There is desperation in Astra’s eyes. Alex can see that she doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want to hurt her. This isn’t the first time she’s pleaded her case. It’s hard to argue that Astra’s motives are benevolent when her hand is around Alex’s throat, but strangely, Alex understands. They would both rather not kill each other, but unless one of them changes their allegiances, one of them has to die. 

“You joined the DEO to save the world, so save it. With us.” 

Absurdly, it strikes Alex that this moment is the closest she has ever been with Astra. Closer even than the day Astra appeared in her apartment to help her save Kara from the Black Mercy. A part of her wants to say yes. Yes to saving the world, yes to mending Kara’s family, yes to Astra’s body, pressed against her just this way. Maybe less choking. 

She’s aware of the fight raging in the background. Kara tangling with Non up in the sky somewhere, J’onn taking on a few of Astra’s other thick-built henchmen, and Vasquez and a handful of others with pulse guns and Kryptonite-enabled rounds, trying to fan out and deal with the rest.

But her awareness is shrinking. Stars burn and sizzle around the edges of her vision and all she sees now is Astra. She needs air. 

Astra’s hand loosens again for a moment, and Alex gasps. “Astra…”

“Your heart is no longer in this,” Astra says. “You may not like my methods, but you know in your heart that it must be done.” 

Alex gathers Astra in a pointless wrestling hold, pointless because Astra will not be moved anywhere she doesn’t want to go. A look of bemusement crosses Astra’s face, a look of not understanding what Alex is trying to accomplish by this move. The truth is, unless someone comes along and saves her, that Alex has no way out of this. She’s weary of fighting these aliens, weary of Astra trying to coax her into being a part of their operation. 

“Benevolent dictatorship,” she says raggedly, “is still dictatorship. No slavery, not for humanity.” 

“You will all perish,” Astra persists, clearly not understanding why Alex is refusing to see the logic of her plan. 

But Alex sees it. She just knows that her constitution is such that she can’t waver from defending the earth from Astra’s plan, regardless of what her ends are. Regardless of how badly she wants to not fight her, wants to give Astra back to Kara. Regardless of that something that burns in Astra’s eyes now, locked in this violent embrace at the edge of a rooftop that represents a fall into forever if she drops. 

“Then we die fighting,” Alex coughs out, her throat still burning. 

She clings hard to Astra’s body now, and Astra has changed her grip to place both hands around her throat. Alex knows she has given Astra no options. Astra’s thumbs press into her windpipe, closing it off, and Alex stands there, holding onto her, Astra supporting her weight as her legs get weaker. The stars return and burn at the edge of her vision again. 

“I will breathe your last breath,” Astra says. She places her mouth around Alex’s, releases her grip for a moment, and pulls air in, into her own lungs. Alex feels it leave. What a strange sensation, she thinks. 

_Kara,_ she thinks, _who’s going to look after Kara?_

The stars consume everything and her eyes close. She can still see them, until they fade and she can’t. The last thing she feels is Astra’s mouth on hers, and regret for what might have been.


End file.
